She cut no quarter for the abusers. Her intelligence, breadth of knowledge of her subject, her teaching ability, her scientific mind, her humor, her compassion are seen throughout all her writings. It would be impossible to measure the amount of help and good she has been to people around the world.
Barbara voiced a concern to me that I had been pondering too. The outcome of the blog is less certain. Barbara has asked me if I will help her with this project. If any of you have any other suggestions as to how to approach this, please comment. A true heroine has laid down her sword. She has obviously done lots of research and has her own experience. Chloe rated it liked it Aug 16, Annette Scheulen rated it it was amazing Sep 03, Debra Parmley rated it it was amazing Jun 01, Dan Desmarques rated it it was amazing Jun 04, Erin rated it liked it Mar 17, ComfyChair rated it it was amazing Jan 26, Marshall Dietz rated it it was amazing Sep 18, Izziewizzy rated it really liked it Nov 08, Ines rated it it was ok Jun 18, Randall Jantjies rated it liked it Oct 04, Luciska rated it it was ok Jan 05, Allison rated it liked it Jun 03, Lee of Shalott marked it as to-read Apr 30, Vesna marked it as to-read Oct 04, Cindy Zaccagnini marked it as to-read Jan 21, Shubham Keshri marked it as to-read Jan 22, Anita Baresa marked it as to-read Feb 23, Nirmin is currently reading it Mar 13, Hala marked it as to-read Mar 18, Dorota added it Apr 15, Com marked it as to-read May 16, Mary Russell marked it as to-read Aug 29, Sammy Ayres marked it as to-read Aug 31, Sammy marked it as to-read Aug 31, Sakha marked it as to-read Nov 25, She suckered her family into taking her back!
They didn't know what she had done to them behind their backs, and she told them that her depraved college friends had hooked her on drugs and tried to drag her away from her family into the cesspool of their immorality. Presto-chango, embraced by her hoodwinked family, she got happy again.
In fact, she says that thus "coming home" is the only thing that kept her from killing herself. And so far she has lived happily ever after. All she needed was mirrors to reflect a falsified image of herself that she can pretend is real, one that keeps her from seeing her true self.
This scenario sheds light on why narcissists often report going through periods when they contemplate suicide but very rarely ever kill themselves: instead they simply find people to fool. Problem solved. This scenario is also consistent with what a narcissist like Sam Vaknin says, and it squares with my other observations about narcissists. So, I have a good deal of confidence in this explanation.
Of course, whether you accept it or not, is up to you. The discussion at the post Cruel and Unusual Punishment took an ironic turn that you might like to check out. To briefly summarize: The post pointed out how narcissists suffer when they are alone.
This happens when their sources of narcissistic supply dry up and they can't find another host. No mirrors, no mirage of a false self to identify with. So, the normally rare and easily re-repressed moments of unwanted self-awareness become frequent and virtually assail them.
These are the times when they look in the mirror, see their true selves, and think of suicide. This is why you can punish a narcissist by simply locking her alone in a room as the post Cruel and Unusual Punishment says.
Some commenters took this post as supportive of their idea that narcissists are unhappy people who suffer greatly inside. But the post doesn't support that idea at all. In other words, you must deprive her of mirrors. Yes, deep down inside the narcissist is wretched and miserable, but you are committing an egregious error in logic if you fail to distinguish the level of this "suffering. So, is he really "suffering" at all? No, he keeps getting high on his drug to kill that pain.
He feels fine. In fact, he feels great. Only in those rare moments when something happens to remind him of the truth about himself, so that the truth rises to consciousness, does he experience a twinge now and then.
But what does he then do at the speed of thought? He represses it again! He's happy, happy, happy again. In other words, he's happy Wouldn't we all wish to be so happy Normally, narcissists have no trouble repressing the unwanted moments of self-awareness that would make them see themselves for what they are and feel bad about themselves.
They think they are grand and perfect. It's great to be them. That's the power of self-delusion. Some say, "Well then, why not be like a narcissist then, if being one is so wonderful? That's it! That's why psychopaths and other narcissists choose to be the way they are. That's why treatment does no good. That's why you can never get through to them to change them. Indeed, why should they change, abandon their delusions, and be miserable? As it says in scripture, "The wicked prosper. They think we're the crazy ones for choosing to burden ourselves with a conscience and empathy.
I think this is a crucial fact to face about them. More on this subject later. We are experiencing spring floods, which raise the high water table because they have filled in too much marshland for parks and apparantly cause problems with the phone lines.
Even voice communications are scratchy at times. Connection to the Internet is unreliable. And, for much of the day, I am stuck on a dial-up connection. So, please understand if your comments are not moderated quickly and if my posting and commenting is light. Connecting to the Internet is kinda like a "hit-or-miss" proposition, and even when you have a connection, you never know when it will get dropped because of interfence on the line.
A narcissist I knew found herself taking a Basic Studies course, Speech , during her sixth year of college when her mother finally forced her to graduate. She told me that the other students freshmen and sophomores were naive. That they took things for granted and — well, it sounded like she was saying they thought life a piece of cake. Kinda like the American Dream: if you do your best, do things right, and play by the rules, you will succeed and live happily ever after.
So, for her first speech, she thought to wise them up by showing them that they shouldn't be so carefree. In that speech she told them that they should take nothing for granted, that no matter who you are, you can have "it all taken away.
Your job, career, your friends and family — everything. And through no fault of your own. No matter how good a person you are. No matter how well you do what you do. I naturally thought she was referring to the possibility of some great catastrophe, such as war, destroying lives.
But she glossed over that and zeroed-in on what she called "everyone's deepest fear," character assassination. She said that, behind your back, anyone could spread lies about you that would completely destroy you. By doing this, that person could take away everything you had. He or she could make you a social outcast, taking even your loved ones away from you. The devastating power of the lie could put you on Skid Row, where you would end up at the bottom as a rag-picker or a bag-lady.
And there was nothing you could do about it. For, you might as well be one, because, by treating you like one, they're perceptions were relentlessly making you one. Deep down inside, she said, everyone knows this, and that it is "everyone's deepest fear. Even those who believe in God don't claim that he enforces his rules to maintain law and order.
He allows destroyers to destroy to their hearts' content. Only in the next world is supposed to get around to punishing violations of his rules though by then it's too late, so I don't see what for ;- Technorati Tags: narcissistic personality disorder narcissism. Let's take a look at this line that narcissists aren't really bad, that they lash out at you because they feel "threatened. Like when you are trying please them, when you are saying you love them, when they are already mad at you and you are trying to appease them, when you try to get them to listen to you.
WHAM — you expect the normal reaction to these friendly behaviors, but what do you get instead? It's a shock tactic that takes you aback and makes you have to pinch yourself. What on earth have you done to "threaten" the poor narcissist? Let's look at the last example — trying to get her to listen to you. By doing that, you ARE "threatening" her, I'm afraid.
Never a straight answer. Always handing you some meaningless vagary or one that could mean many different things as if it says something significant. Like anything that does this viz. And, simply because it works, nothing is as addictive as a pain killer. Hence Narcissus is well-named from the Greek word for narcosis.
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